As usual, my writer-crush Holly over at the Pervocracy pretty much gets everything right forever with her post about men and feminism. I don’t have a lot to contribute; I just want her awesome writing to get out there more. Read the whole thing here, but this is my favorite part:
The other big thing men would get out of feminism is happier, freer women. Don’t smirk, ‘cause I’m serious. When you treat someone like a trophy, an enemy agent, a sex toy, a child, or a space alien, the response you get is going to be about as bizarre as those options suggest. When you treat them like a person, asking no more and expecting no less, they’re going to respond like a person.
Powerful people don’t nag - they can get things done themselves. Powerful people don’t cling - they can survive on their own. Powerful people don’t manipulate - they can get what they want honestly. Powerful people don’t complain - they have less to complain about. Powerful people don’t make guys pay for dinner - they can afford to pay their share. When women are happy with our lives, we don’t subtract from the finite happiness pool held by men; we spread it around and make everyone happier.
Shira and I have repeated, over and over and over again in this space - if we continue to train men to view women as something other than human, what we’re going to get is a society that treats women as other than human. It’s not real complicated.